i always think i m an optimist, always looking on the bright side of life, believes that there is hope and dream is a powerful weapon. and that is why i am still standing. still standing tho the ground shakes and the sky darkens. i hv given my best but some believe that my best is not the best yet.

so they keep on pushing me. asking me to dream big, bigger than what i believe i can reach. ushering me towards the limitless sky, higher than i imagine i could fly. forcing me to think outside the box until my brain wanted to explode, and convincing me that the sea is big but the ocean has endless limit.

i'm shouting 'stop!' but they smile and pat on my back. saying that there is something in me that needs a bit of polishing.

no, no, no! get away from me. i need a space for me. i want to run and let the sweat drowns me. i want to fly and see everything i want to see. dont push me anymore. you are getting me close to the cliff. and i m not sure if i can handle another fall. not after..well, not after the last tragedy..just dont! because if u insist, i think i will..well, just dont, okay! big girl dont cry, much.. and i dont like crying as crying is too tiring. and crying breaks my scarcely-there will..and crying makes me lonely and crying just kills me..believe me!

i need time. a time to think, a time to heal, a time to feel, a time to be what i really want to be. some time, that u hardly gives me

Guide me Allah. make me among those who hv your guidance. I only hv You, when others is nowhere to be seen.